Dave in the City out West (DITCOW)

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Blog: Nightly Juice

August 28th, 2016


There can often be juice at night; here are the many places to find "juice," PLUS the reason trainwrecks are so popular.


Ever have orange juice at night?  Oh, try it!  It's pretty refreshing.  You wouldn't believe how good it tastes.   I got a bad carton of it last week.  I bought "Florida's Natural" orange juice which over the years was good to me, but not this time.  The juice tastes bland and it has none of that sharp sweetness with a tang of tart I'm used to.  It's like when you get those extra large oranges that aren't fresh and it tastes like you're eating little water balloons they're so tasteless.

I'll opt for a better brand next time out.  Onward.


One time I went to the Coca Cola freestyle machine and thought I'd get clever and add orange flavor to my coke.  That did not taste good at all.   Orange is similar to cheese where I feel like adding it to anything can enhance the flavor, but coke is a notable exception.  Coke wants to be the star of the show, and having a strong flavor like orange try to coexist within a coke ended in cacophony.   It was like coke was fighting orange for their own soda dominance, rather than the two flavors complimenting each other.


I only realized this year the guy that does the Jack in the Box commercials was replaced.  The voice of the "Jack" character, who wears a giant clown ball over his head, is now this wimpy sounding guy.  It sounded JUST close enough to the original guy from the 90's with this witty sarcastic humor, but he has none of that wit or sarcasm or even panache with his voice.  The new guys' voice is a little more squealy but apparently close enough to the original for the Jack in the Box team to use.


I went to Souplantation the other day for that delicious BBQ Chicken Salad.  I saw some very noisy kids and their family in the line and I said "I better go find a table far away from them, let me try the tall table bar".  All of those jokers went to the tall table bar!!  it was a long table and apparently it was situated like a family table so everyone just sat right next to me.   I tried to give it my best shot but even with headphones on there was no avoiding all the noise.  Then little girls and boys would be crying off to the side by the beverage station.  It was various causes, maybe one of them fell or one of them didn't get his ice cream, I wouldn't know.   I picked a less desirable time to get lunch no?  I'll have to go later in the day to minimize child to crowd density.


Why does MTV still do the Video Music Awards when they stopped playing music videos?


One of the advantages of growing up is that you no are longer tasked to decipher the logic of nonsensical nursery rhymes like "This old man, he played six, he played knick-knack on my sticks."   None of that makes sense!


I think I figured out why controversy and trainwrecks are so popular in the media today.  I *know* guys who take great enjoyment in watching people get arrested or say stupid things that make everybody angry.   See, a lot of people in America like to watch people get in trouble!  Remember when you were in school and you had that "troublemaker" or whoever it was not write on the board right or yell at someone and they sent him to the principal.  Then the whole room got quiet and stared at the guy going to the principal.  Or, how about, when that one guy or girl peed one's pants?  Then everyone was like "oooh look at that guy who peed his pants."  That poor thing, why would we stare at that, he feels bad enough!


It took years of me wondering about these things, but it comes down to guys who LOVE to watch people get in trouble.    Oooh trouble!  You remember that whole thing when you were young.  And what got crowds together at school more than anything?  More than an assembly or a good student award or recess, any of those.   Remember what it was?  FIGHT!  FIGHT!  FIGHT!  People loved trouble!  ...but they hated **getting** in trouble, they much preferred to not have the responsibility and watch someone *else* get in trouble.


You ever see a nice picture from someone you know on Facebook, and then meet the same person later and go "that was a cool pic you put on facebook of x or y" and the person goes "well why didn't you 'like' it on facebook then?!" 


I had a strange weekend.   2/3rd of it was spent on my bed going in and out of sleep.  I was tired, fellas.   I don't really know what got me that tired, but there I was just lying down and dozing off.  It was a crazy scene.  Sunday morning, when I could have done laundry, I thought of going onto the bed to clear the spread for the laundry basket and as I went down I started to hug the pillows and then it was all over!  I was snuggling with the blankets in broad daylight, just like that, and took a one hour nap.   What a scene that was.


It almost seems as if the bed got this giant magnet and roped me into its trap.  Well played, you all.


Hope that was some good juice!  If you liked it, have some more.   Have a good day, everyone.